Tuesday, July 31, 2007

The Business Mustache

Whether timber baron or whale oil tycoon, I can think of no more proper business attire than a properly groomed mustache.

Monday, July 30, 2007

The Kind Of Mustache You Want To Settle Down With

The bride is clearly beside herself with joy at being legally wed to such a fine mustache.

Sunday, July 29, 2007

Amateur Mustache Photography

While the details of their mustaches are obscured, these gentlemen are to be lauded for venturing outside for an amateur snapshot of their mustaches. To leave the safety of a professional mustache photography studio is very brave.

Saturday, July 28, 2007

A High Refinement of the Art

After all the discussion of disease, beardism, and bird attacks, it was high time that a fine, healthy, full, and manly mustache was featured.

Friday, July 27, 2007

The Dark Road to Beard-dom

I hope it is just a shadow on this gentleman's lower lip and not the beginnings of a beard.

Thursday, July 26, 2007

The Frowning Mustache

The untwisted handlebar is a cowardly mustache; over or under, but choose a twist.

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Visual Lexiconography

Possibly the origin of that obscure phrase: "Oh, fiddle'stache!"

Sunday, July 22, 2007

Mustache Health Weekend, pt. 4

This poor sufferer's mustache is completely bald in the middle. There are many causes of Mustache Baldness, but the most perplexing is the little understood North American Hook-beaked Mustache Swallow, an insidious creature that steals the softest mustache hairs to line its nests. Thought extinct after their flesh became a delicacy in the salons of Europe in the 1880s, there have been recent reports of a live specimen caught in the Oregon territories.

Saturday, July 21, 2007

Mustache Health Weekend, pt. 3

Most of the afflicted refuse to admit it, but blonde hair is a disease, of the mustache at least.

Friday, July 20, 2007

Another Angry Mustache

A Very Serious Man, With A Very Serious Mustache.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Oval Handle Bar

The 90 degree angle of this gentleman's overhand twists are quite impressive.

Monday, July 16, 2007

A Fine Part

This dapper young fellow has just started growing his overhand twists, but his mustache part is exquisitely defined.

Sunday, July 15, 2007

Mustache Health Weekend, pt. 2

The right-handed side of this gentleman's mustache droops quite severely compared to the left. It is possible his mustache has suffered a debilitating stroke.

Saturday, July 14, 2007

Mustache Health Weekend, pt. 1

While many men stoically sit for a mustache portrait, this young man seems almost angry. It could be an indication of a mustache-wasting disease, specifically the type triggered by strict Fletcherism.

Thursday, July 12, 2007

The Fisherman

No bearded hooligan could have caught such a nice specimen, I'll tell you that!

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

The Immature Handlebar

While this gentleman has grown his mustache thickly, he has yet to develop his nascent overhand twists.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

A Classic Handlebar

A classic handlebar with an overhand twist. The gentleman might be working toward a facespanner. God speed, sir.

Monday, July 9, 2007

The Overhand Twist

A robust and thick handlebar with a overhand twist. His right side may have drooped under a fierce flash of powder or it could be a rare underhand twist.

Sunday, July 8, 2007

The Neglected

Given the careful attention paid to the part and swoop of the hair it makes it likely that the bushy neglect of the mustache is purposeful. Some mustaches long to run free, and some men are brave enough to let them.

Saturday, July 7, 2007

The Straight and True

Not only has the handlebar mustache almost died out (there is but one prominent example on television outside of period dramas, and even his is often unkempt and untwisted), but the most impressive variation, the facespanner is nowhere to be found. This proud example is a straight and true as the man who wears it.

Friday, July 6, 2007

A Rare Comb of Mustaches

It is not often so many fine mustaches gather in one spot, especially for the camera. The two unfortunates on the left may be apprenticing to some day grow their own examples, or they may have lost the use of their mustaches in the war or a farm accident.