Tuesday, February 12, 2008

More Mustache Slander: The Colbert Report

It has come to my attention that inconsequential TV funnyman Stephen Colbert made the following pronouncement on his little-watched basic cable "news" show.

"They [homosexuals] have already claimed mustaches and short-shorts, they've ruined those for the rest of us."

and later

"A statistical correlation [between mustaches and homosexuality], it's not cause and effect. Mustaches don't make you gay, but they don't help."

This is the sort of ill-considered tripe that flows from the follicularly impaired, Mr. Colbert. Gay or straight, any mustached man is more masculine than a barelipped buffoon such as you!

Jingoism: The last refuge of the clean-shaven scoundrel!


(lord) franko said...

hear, hear.

but for the record, mr. colbert also has a mexican alter ego (whose name escapes me) who has a moustache:



reader said...

Mustache or no . . . the man is an American hero who stands for truthiness and America (well . . . according to him, he is America, and so can we). Just maybe this patriot could give a Colbert bump to the mustache!


Percival said...

Sorry, just don't see how a mustachophobe is a 'hero.'

Anonymous said...

What? He is a mustachophile, but a homophobe. He is a man upset that mustaches have been incorporated into the homosexualist agenda. Hate the sinner, love the stache: that is his motto.

Loves mustaches just as much as Colbert said...

Do you not have the brains to realize he is nothing more then a man who satires what mainstream idiots think?